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Angels & Assholes
Smash Burger Flat Crinkle & Squeak Cow Dog Toy
Smash Burger Flat Crinkle & Squeak Cow Dog Toy
Regular price
$7.00 USD
Regular price
Sale price
$7.00 USD
Shipping calculated at checkout.
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Is your dog a perfect little angel or a total asshole?
If your resident asshole has already graduated from standard plushies, it’s time to serve up a Smash Burger. Part of our unapologetic Angels & Assholes collection, this 17.5-inch long cow toy contains absolutely zero stuffing—meaning no messy white fluff cleanups for you. Instead, it is smashed completely flat, lined with loud crinkle paper, and armed with a hidden internal squeaker. It's the ultimate dual-noise target for a pup with chaos on their mind.
Why It’s Good to be Bad
- Stuffingless "No Mess" Design: Completely flat and empty of traditional plush stuffing, making it the perfect choice for professional shredders who love to gut toys.
- Loud Built-In Squeaker: Features a hidden squeaker that lets out a sharp, high-pitched squeal every single time your dog clamps down on it.
- Noisy Crinkle Paper Core: Packed from head to tail with premium crinkle material that crackles under your dog's paws and jaws, keeping them guessing with every bite.
- Angels & Assholes Approved: Lightweight enough for your angelic pups to carry around like a trophy, and hilariously satisfying for your chaotic monsters to stomp, squeak, and flatten into a real smash burger.
Specifications
- Style: Smash Burger (Flat black and white spotted cow)
- Features: Hidden squeaker + full-body internal crinkle paper lining
- Material: Ultra-soft polyester plush texturized exterior
- Dimensions: 17.7" L x 5" W (45 cm x 12.7 cm)
- Best For: Thrashers, squeaker lovers, interactive fetch, and dogs that love crunchy textures
Disclaimer: No toy is completely indestructible. If your dog is a certified asshole who eats fabric for breakfast, please supervise playtime and remove the carcass once this smash burger gets completely charred.
